There is a lot of confusion that occurs in the personal development space. Most of the confusion comes from the many options that are available. Additionally, confusion gets exaggerated because many of the ways of learning about options available are through the advertisements of the people selling their products/services, who often overpromise and not address the limits of their offerings.
If you are considering self-improvement options, consider these pros and cons of some of the most popular forms of personal development:
Transformational Coaching (one-on-one) Pros/Cons: Transformational coaching is usually accomplished one-on-one or in groups. A key component of transformational coaching is the frequent interaction with a coach. Pro: this type of coaching is best when you need to change something about yourself to reach a goal that is outside of your box. Transformational coaching can help you break through your limiting thoughts, beliefs, actions, and habits. This can lead to you getting to your goals in a completely new way. Sounds great, but there are some drawbacks: it can be hard, take time, be expensive, and requires total commitment. Additionally, it is not for everyone. If your goals are within your box and/or you resist change, there’s no reason to involve a coach and the intense coaching process.
Self Help Pros/Cons: Self-help is the most popular form of personal transformation. It’s mostly popular because of the ease of getting a book or watching a video and doing it at your own pace, which has benefits and limitations. The pros: It feels great to be working on yourself and you will likely improve in the area(s) that you are focusing on. The Limitation: Unfortunately, our biggest opportunity is usually in our blind spot and needs to be reflected by someone else. So self-helpers tend to work on what they believe they should work on or whatever the popular thing that everyone else is working on. However, that may not end up being the actual thing to work on. Self-helpers tend to get strong in an area that isn’t making a difference or drift further into a roadblock that they unconsciously set up for themselves.
Finding Your Tribe Pros/Cons: Many people seeking personal transformation usually feel like an outcast and that their traditional environment isn’t serving their needs, which is why they are looking for more. That usually ends with people eventually searching for and finding their tribe. But there are some benefits and limitations as well. The Pros: First off, you no longer feel like an outcast because you found your tribe. You’ve found a group of people that are doing what you are doing and how you are doing it. That “tribe hood” is very helpful to many people and helps you push your goals forward. The Drawback: The tribe will ultimately develop “group think.” Group think is when most people think the same and therefore the group will likely share the same blind spots and have similar roadblocks and stops. Additionally, the groups’ righteousness may stop participants from getting the assistance that moves their goals forward because of the feeling their needs are being met by the group.
Mentorship Pros/Cons: Many people love the comfort of having a mentor because its literally someone who has done what you are trying to do and can tell you how to do it. The Pros: It’s great to have someone in your corner that can tell you what to do, share the mistakes and successes that they’ve had, etc. It’s super valuable to learn what worked and didn’t work for someone else. Mentors can also come with super helpful connections. The Drawbacks: Sometimes the way one person does something won’t work for anyone else. Additionally, our world is evolving faster than ever and “the way to do it” becomes obsolete quickly. Also, in a mentorship you have to be willing to do it the way the person is telling you or at least in a way where their input is valuable. To this point, many visionaries are doing something that hasn’t been done, or doing something in a way that hasn’t been done before, so it’s hard to find a mentor as no one has done the thing before.
As you can see, personal development isn’t a “cut and dry,” “One size fit all” endeavor. It takes some effort to figure out what you and your goals need. Keep moving forward, don’t get discouraged, and good luck.
Jason Dukes is an Executive Life Coach to Visionary Leaders and helps them bring their visions to life through innovative and customized one-on-one programs.
